A Christmas giveaway

Dear friends, there has been little sewing round these parts lately. I can blame most of my inactivity on this:

Yes the Miette cardigan is almost there and the chocolates are almost gone. It’s pretty much the first thing I’ve knitted since school so it’s slooow going but we’re gradually getting there. I’ve had to rip it back once already (from row 45 so whilst a little soul destroying it didn’t out-and-out kill me) because as a totally novice knitter I don’t actually know how to fix my mistakes. Isn’t this the worst? To say the least? Even more, I don’t actually know what sort of mistakes I could make, never mind how to fix them. I don’t really know what a dropped stitch looks like, or whether I’m knitting a particularly fiddly stitch the right way. If it wasn’t for Youtube I’d have given up weeks ago. Isn’t YouTube amazing? I’ve also been following the knitalong that Today’s Agenda staged back in 2012. It’s ace although not necessarily aimed at a total beginner so there are a few gaps that Youtube fills for me – like picking up stitches for the sleeves.

I’ve started with the 34 bust size and not made any adjustments – like how would I even begin to do that? – except that when it came to the ribbing at the bottom I gave up on the ktbl2, ptbl2 malarkey after three failed attempts and resorted to a simple k2, p2 affair. My stitches were getting so twisted and hard to knit I must have been doing something wrong but I didn’t know what. I’ll do the same for the ribbing at the bottom of the sleeves too.

Anyway – yakking on and on about knitting JoJo, where’s the goddamn giveaway I hear you say!

So a while back I got an email from the scrumptious By Hand London gals asking if I’d like a copy of their gorgeous new pattern – the Georgia Dress. Featuring fitted cups, a panelled skirt and some knockout strap variations, the hemline can be raised or lowered depending on your particular fetish.

Isn’t it darling? So sexy and glamorous. In fact, too sexy and glamorous for me. This dress would be made up, twirled about in and loved for an hour and then it would languish in the back of my wardrobe feeling unloved for ever. I have nowhere to wear it! I have nothing to go to! This isn’t self-pity – this is my practical side coming out. Hear my brusque no-nonsense nannying tone? Wise up, Joanne – you ain’t never gonna wear this baby to the ball. So… because I’m a kind, loving sort, I told the By Hand London ladies just this very thing, but added that if they were kind enough to shake their diamante-encrusted wands and send the Georgia my way, I would become your very own fairy godmother and offer it up to you guys. And because Elisalex and the gang are the nicest ladies in the sewing business, no I’m not one bit biased that is FACT, here it is! Cinderellas – you SHALL go to the ball (cue some sparkly noises).

The giveaway is open to all and sundry across the globe and will close at midnight on the 30th of November GMT. Any entries after that time will turn into pumpkins. I will get it posted straight away so that you might even have time to knock it up for your Christmas party! All you have to do is comment here telling me what event you will wear this dress to. Make it special, exciting, daring, raunchy. Give me cheap vicarious thrills why doncha? Winner will be selected at random.

And we’ll all live happily ever after.